Goodbye to OC Season 5.
After the two-part reunion this week, Season 5 of “The Real Housewives of Orange County” has sadly come to a conclusion. While watching the train wreck of a reunion that included plenty of tears, hurt feelings…and what seemed like more plastic surgery on one stage than in LA and the surrounding suburbs combined, I started thinking about my all-time favorite moments of this season.
Though it was truly a challenge to pick out just a few of the most memorable “housewives” moments, I was finally able to narrow it down to the list below.
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- The Return of Slade “sleezeball” Smiley. Oh yes, much to the dismay of most of the housewives, Slade is on his 3rd housewife and once again back on the show. Mr. Smiley just cannot get enough of the spotlight and loves to cause as much drama as he can while he is in it. Though I find him creepy and manipulative, I find his pathetic serial housewives dating obsession absolutely hilarious. I don’t know if I should feel more sorry for him or the housewives he has tricked into liking him….because their brains are obviously experiencing some severe Botox side-effects.
- Lynne vs. her teenage daughters. And the award for most oblivious mom on the face of the planet goes to (drumroll, please)….Lynne Curtin. Though raising two teenage girls in the OC can’t be easy, viewers watched this season as Lynne blatantly ignored her daughters’ very obvious problems. Not only do they not follow any of their parents’ rules, I don’t think they’ve ever even heard of the terms “punishment” or “consequences.” Lynne just smiles and nods her newly tightened face as she watches her daughters continually make poor decisions like showing up to the final cast party drunk. And you know there has to be a problem when Gretchen steps in with parenting advice…that actually makes sense.
- Alexis Gets Paranoid. In the middle of the season, Gretchen threw a tupperware party for the fellow housewives and some of her other friends. However, the party quickly went south when Alexis accused another partygoer with hitting on her husband. First of all, the woman was casually talking to Alexis’s husband, certainly nothing to cause a scene about. And who honestly goes to a tupperware party to pick up guys? Answer: hopefully no one. Second of all, as another woman at the party pointedly stated, “Alexis’s husband is not attractive, why would anyone hit on him?” While this may be a brash statement, Alexis’s husband is portrayed as one of the most pompous, controlling and idiotic cast members on the show, I can only imagine the air that he exudes in real life. All in all, it was a pointless but entertaining fight…and will probably go down in history as the most action a tupperware party has ever scene.
- Brianna’s 3-Day Blind Date. Being the meddling mother that she is, Vicki arranged for one of her client’s sons to fly half-way across the country to engage in a 3-Day Blind Date with her daughter, Brianna. I’m not sure why Brianna agreed to this arrangement in the first place, but the end result was 3 days of uncomfortableness and awkward conversations. After the first few hours, it was clear that they, understandably, ran out of things to talk about…but they still had a good 65 hours to go. I wasn’t even there and I wanted to curl up into a ball and die just watching this unfold on TV. In fact, my friends and I still talk about the whole thing. I can only imagine the level of pain Brianna actually had to experience.
Season 5 for the ladies of the OC was truly a whirlwind. There were marriage problems, there were financial problems and there were Vicki problems…but, as always, it was a season worth watching. Though I now have “The Real Housewives of New York City” to fill my “housewives” void, I can safely (and sadly) say that I will be counting down the days until “The Real Housewives of Orange County” Season 6.
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Big Fights in the Big Apple.
They’re baaaack, and they’re more entertaining than ever! This week marked the return of the “Real Housewives of New York City,” for what is sure to be a catfight-filled season. As a NYC housewives fanatic (and Jill Zarin’s #1 fan), I could not be more thrilled.
The ladies kicked off their third season in their usual ways…Ramona freaked out on everyone, the Countess shelled out tips on what the “classy” thing to do is, Jill got involved in every fight she could, Bethenny used sarcasm in every waking moment, Kelly is constantly made analogies that no one understands and, in a surprising turnaround, Alex sort of just blended into the background.
However, we have seen also seen some major changes. In an ironic twist, Bethenny, the infamous single housewife, is now involved in a serious relationship while the Countess, who once insisted on giving Bethenny dating tips from circa 1945, has just recently finalized her divorce. Also, Jill and Bethenny, the once inseparable and hilarious duo, are now on their way to becoming mortal enemies. In the midst of all their fighting, Bethenny told Jill to get a hobby and as we heard at least five times during the entire episode, her new hobby is not hanging out with Bethenny. This guarantees new and random friendships (Jill, the Countess and Kelly?) throughout the season. And, Ramona has declared that she is “renewing” herself….which apparently just involves getting a few inches cut off your hair.
It’s certainly going to be a bumpy road during these next few months, and I cannot wait to witness every part of it. The preview into the entire season promises entertainment, snarky comments and drama, drama, drama.
(source: Hulu)
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Every Monday at 9 p.m., I anxiously tune into Bravo for my latest reality obsession “Kell on Earth.” No, not just to watch Kelly bite an employee’s head off for an invitation list mistake or their inability to guarantee that all aspects of technology will be running smoothly at all times (i.e. the office printer). But rather, I tune in to for the character that is Andrew S.
Andrew works as an assistant for one of the other business partners of People’s Revolution. Now I don’t want to oversell this, but Andrew S. may be the best thing that has happened to reality TV since Tim Gunn coined the phrase “make it work.” Though he isn’t one of the main members of the cast, every second he’s featured in an episode is like reality TV heaven.
So, I decided to come up with a list of all the reasons why I think Andrew steals the spotlight every single time he’s featured on camera.
1) If I had to guess, Andrew stands at 5 feet tall…at best. However, he has more personality in his tiny body than he has product in his hair. In such a high stress environment, Andrew brings a refreshing energy to the show.
2) His commentary in each episode always includes never-ending sass and memorable one-liners that I will probably continually repeat whenever the occasion presents itself.
3) In a recent episode, he begins to crack under the pressure and begins crying to some of the other members of the cast. However, as tears run down his face…so does his bronzer.
4) As a former LA hairstylist, Andrew recently noticed one of the other employees’ hair was not having its finest moment. So, they took a break from work and he touched up her highlights…because he couldn’t concentrate on his work while having to “look at those roots.”
And last….but most definitely not least.
5) He has tattoos on his body dedicated to Britney Spears. On the show, he explained, with a straight face, the meaning behind the “Stronger” song lyrics he had tattooed to his wrists.
Source: Bravo TV
As a Britney fan, I can appreciate that. As a human, I can really only laugh.
I could go on and on but those are just some of the reasons why I tune in every week to see what Andrew S. has in store for Bravo TV viewers. He’s tanned, he’s tiny and he has undoubtedly taken Snooki’s place as my new favorite reality TV star. I smell potential for a hit spin-off series….
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Real Housewives. A Real Mess.
Another “Real Housewives” episode, another perfect opportunity for more drama to ensue. More appropriately, I should say another opportunity for the housewives to attack Vicki, everyone’s favorite antagonist. In the most recent episode, the ladies of the OC took a trip up north to San Francisco. In true “Housewives” fashion, what started out as an enjoyable girls-only trip quickly went downhill during what Vicki labeled “Gang Up on Vicki Day.”
While out to lunch, Alexis, the newcomer of the group, confronted Vicki about the harsh words she had for the group at a recent dinner party. As all true “Housewives” fans know, Vicki does not take criticism or confrontation, in general, well (that may be the understatement of the year). Insults were thrown back and forth and, as usual, Vicki ran outside in tears. After what seemed to be about two hours, Vicki finally rejoined the table and, at Alexis’s suggestion, the group engaged in a 20 minute prayer session…in the middle of the restaurant…during lunch hour (that’s a new one for the housewives). Now, I’m no fan of Alexis. In fact, I find her Barbie doll appearance mixed with her extreme Christian values overall frightening. However,Vicki does have a habit of offending others and it’s time she actually listened to what people have to say, if not for her own well-being than so viewers do not have to endure the same catfight over and over again.
The San Francisco trip also occurred during a pretty chaotic time for everyone. Lately, it hasn’t been so “sunny” back in the OC for most of the housewives. They have all, individually, been dealing with some pretty serious issues. During this season, Tamra’s marriage has been treading on thin ice as Simon and her try to sort out all of their problems, which for some reason Vicki has a big role in. Vicki has also just found out that her daughter, Briana, may have cancer and they have been anxiously awaiting the biopsy results. On top of it, Lynne and her family have recently been evicted from their Laguna Beach house after her husband hid their financial problems from everyone. While the family struggles to find a new place to live, Lynne dropped $2000 on a leather jacket while shopping in San Fran. Due to the stress, Lynne and her husband’s marriage seems to also be falling apart and their daughters are struggling with a lot of animosity towards their dad. So, what is their solution to this financial problem? Take a family vacation. Though I often hear a lot of wise words from this cast of characters, that may be the best idea I’ve heard in all Housewives history.
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Kell on Earth. Heaven on Bravo.
There’s no better way to start off a week than with a new episode of “Kell on Earth.” For those of you that don’t know, “Kell on Earth” is Bravo’s newest reality TV sensation about Kelly Cutrone, PR power-player. Cutrone is the owner of People’s Revolution, an incredibly successful PR firm that represents fashion designers from all around the globe. In the past, Kelly has appeared on shows such as “The Hills” and “The City” so she is no stranger to reality television.
As a PR major and fashion fanatic, “Kell on Earth” is basically a reality television dream come true for me. However, I have quickly come to learn that this dream can easily turn into a nightmare, as the show gets its title from Cutrone’s temper….and overall frightening demeanor. It has only been the second episode of the season, yet viewers have already seen Cutrone lose her cool over a handful of times. In the most recent episode, Cutrone blows up at the group of interns she has working for her. For an upcoming fashion show, the interns were told to organize a group of gift-bags for the editors of all the major fashion publications. The combination of miscommunication and chaos, however, resulted in a set of gift-bags gone wrong. After it took six interns to put together 15 gift-bags, the end result was a pair of jeans thrown into a bag with poorly handwritten labels.
Watch below to see the drama unfold.
Though some may say her rant may have been a little overly dramatic and filled with a few too many f-bombs, Cutrone did have a right to be upset. I, for one, would not want to be the one that delivered Anna Wintour’s gift-bag to her with her name scribbled on a crumpled-up white paper bag.
Though the overall idea of working at People’s Revolution seems very glamorous and ooh-la-la, there would have to be large amounts of money involved if I had to be subjected to that kind of ridicule day after day. In fact, Cutrone has even become famous for her office motto “if you have to cry, go outside.” I’m not sure what scares me more, the fact that she came up with a motto in regards to emotional breakdowns in the first place or that she has to constantly repeat it to her employees. After watching the show, it would not be an exaggeration to say that I would most likely be out the door and at the nearest therapist’s office within the first 30 minutes of starting a job with People’s Revolution. However, I think “Kell on Earth” is a good lesson for future PR practitioners. PR is filled with “Kelly Cutrones,” which can oftentimes make the industry very tough. With PR, you have to prepared, both mentally and emotionally, to work in such an environment if you want to succeed in the PR industry.
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Katie Fanella
everythingreality
